


Rumor Has It

by slowjaems



Category: NCT (Band), NCT Dream
Genre: Alternate Universe - Politics, Chef! Hyuck, Gardener! Jeno, Hacker! Renjun, Infidelity, M/M, Mark has a food kink, President! Mark, Wayv members won't let him live it down, also Markhyuck making out, lots of scandals in this, markhyuck, this is mostly rated m bc of that and dirty jokes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:53:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24659434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slowjaems/pseuds/slowjaems
Summary: Renjun’s first mistake is getting incredibly wasted on his twenty-first birthday. His second is hacking the cameras of the presidential kitchen. The third is watching the President make out with his personal chef.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Jeno, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee, Many more TBA, Wong Kun Hang | Hendery/Xiao De Jun | Xiao Jun, will tag them as they're revealed
Comments: 8
Kudos: 89





	Rumor Has It

Huang Renjun lives by a few very important rules.

The first is not to answer phone calls from Hendery past ten o’clock. The second is to lock his phone in the bathroom so that he can actually do his schoolwork and not spend hours trolling on Twitter. The third is to transfer his paychecks to his savings as soon as it’s deposited (or else he’ll spend it all on food and clothes when he doesn’t even go anywhere). Of course, the first is the most important, and it’s also the one Renjun ignores on the night of his twenty-first birthday. He’s lying on his bed in a heap of exhaustion after eight hours of listening to vegan moms explain the importance of protein as if he isn’t making shakes at an actual protein shop. It’s not his ideal job but it pays for his half of the rent and on a rare occasion, at least half of one of his college textbooks. He’s tiredly nibbling on a protein bar when his phone starts to vibrate. Renjun digs it out of his apron, squinting at the caller ID before promptly hitting decline.

“Answer the phone!” A voice shouts from down the hall, making Renjun roll his eyes.

This time, when his phone vibrates, he reluctantly answers.

“Hey!” Hendery greets brightly, and Renjun fights the urge to hang up.

“You literally only have to walk two steps and we could have this conversation in person.” He tells his roommate because he’s never met someone lazier than Hendery.

“You’re not really worth getting out of my bed.” The other boy replies and the snort of amusement that follows lets Renjun know that the permanent presence in Hendery’s room that is Xiaojun has made his daily appearance, “So, what are you doing for the rest of your birthday?” 

“Falling into a protein coma” Renjun tells him around a mouthful of chocolate-covered nuts.

“That’s healthy and lame” Hendery tells him, and he can already see his roommate turning up his nose, “Get dressed, we’re taking you out to celebrate, and it’s Xiaojun’s treat-“

“No it’s not-“

“I can’t go out tonight.” Renjun says, scrambling his mind for excuses before he finally blurts out, “I have to study for my exam tomorrow-“

“It’s Saturday.” Is Hendery’s response that makes him wince.

He runs a hand through his hair, picks a peanut out of his bar, then rolls over and groans.

“I can’t go out.” He moans, cradling his stomach though his roommate couldn’t see, “I don’t feel well.”

“Boo, you protein covered whore.” Hendery replies, and it’s difficult not to picture his amused grin when he adds, “Now, hurry up. Shower and get dressed. Yangyang should be here within the next hour.”

Before Renjun can protest (or come up with another excuse), the call ends and he’s left to stare at his home screen with dread. Seeing as he has no choice, he opens Twitter and voices his frustrations.

dead inside™

@junNOTjune

_i’m going to die tonight_

After he posts, he scrolls through his timeline lazily. He mostly follows meme accounts, a few anime gif accounts, and his friends. Despite this, his timeline is flooded with pictures of the President. Renjun’s not particularly into politics, but when his timeline refreshes itself, he’s practically forced to read the headline.

_BREAKING NEWS! PRESIDENT MARK LEE RUMORED TO BE INVOLVED IN EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIR! FIRST LADY IN DISTRESS AND PRESIDENTIAL CABINET IN “CHAOTIC STATE” CHIEF OF STAFF CLAIMS._

“Holy shit.” Renjun mutters, sitting up in his bed.

He doesn’t follow politics, but everyone knew that Mark Lee was the poster politician. He had the highest approval rating of any elected official their country had ever seen and had never been involved in any scandals, even during his campaign. But it was only his second year as president and according to the Naruto stan account on Renjun’s timeline screaming in caps, an insider was now making claims that he was cheating on his wife. Renjun is tempted to order a pizza and spend the rest of the night reading up on Mark Lee’s list of possible mistresses, but a mention on Twitter quickly makes him groan.

not xiaojun’s bf

@Hen_de_ry

 _rip protein boy_ ❤️ _NOW GO GET DRESSED_

Renjun sighs, tossing his phone aside before pushing himself up from his bed. He yanks his apron off, letting it drop to the floor as he drags himself to the bathroom to prepare for what’s sure to be a night from hell.

As it turns out, the night isn’t so bad. They go to a club near campus, which is packed with familiar faces eager to take advantage of the $2 tequila shots. Xiaojun is more whipped than Renjun thought because all it took was one pouty look from Hendery to get him to cover their tab and for Yangyang to promptly turn Renjun into a container for tequila shots and mixers. By the time one in the morning hits, he’s laughing so loudly at Yangyang’s attempt to dance to Britney Spears “Toxic” that he’s sure his face is going to split into two (if it doesn’t burn off first from how incredibly hot he feels).

He takes a shot off some random girl’s stomach, runs into two walls, and eats three entire orders of wings before Xiaojun claims its time to go home. The entire ride home includes saying barely two words to Yangyang only for the two of them to burst into fits of laughter, hanging on each other with flushed faces and warm grins (while Hendery grinned from the driver’s side and Xiaojun shook his head in the passenger’s seat). When they arrive home, Hendery retires to his room with Xiaojun for their nightly make-out session (that they always deny in the morning with flustered smiles) and Renjun is left to stumble to his room with Yangyang. The brunet is lying on the floor, scrolling through his phone tiredly while Renjun drunkenly tries to find a Netflix movie on his laptop.

“It says that the president is cheating on his wife.” Yangyang says suddenly, giggling tipsily before pointing a finger at his phone, “Bad president!”

“I wonder who the mistress is.” Renjun replies, quickly giving up on his movie search. He plops down against his pillows with a sigh, “Does the president even have a type? His wife is kind of plain.”

“I think her boobs are fake.” Yangyang blurts out randomly. He spots two small balloons by Renjun’s bed, leftover from his birthday surprise, that he quickly stuffs in his shirt. He pushes them together before pulling down the top of his shirt to let them float into the air, “Seriously, at the last UN meeting I swear they were going to just fly to France on their own.”

Renjun can’t help but laugh as Yangyang stands there with the balloons floating above his head.

“I remember reading an article about him saying that they were high school sweethearts. If they’re so in love, I wonder who he would cheat on her with.” Renjun frowns once his laughter has died down.

“How about we stop guessing.” Yangyang looks over at him with a mischievous grin that already has Renjun shaking his head.

“I am not hacking the cameras of an official government building.” He tells the younger quickly.

“Your major literally trains you how to do it, so why not have fun?” Yangyang says with a shrug, “We can find out who the president’s been bending over his oval office desk, but we don’t have to tell anyone about it.”

Either the younger was terribly convincing, or a few tequila shots made Huang Renjun a man of weak will because before he knows it, the Netflix tab is closed and he’s hacking the cameras of the oval office. Renjun has been studying programming since he could first operate a computer. He’s always liked getting to the bottom of things, secrets, rumors, firewalls on heavily guarded government systems. His obsession with Ghost in the Shell during his senior year of high school did nothing to stop his fascination with hacking.

Choosing Computer Science and Information Systems Security as his majors in college cemented his desire to become the hacker investigators called when they wanted to catch the perp dumping bodies in the dumpster at midnight – just like in the movies. Since middle school he’s imagined himself sitting in a room surrounded by computer screens, typing away on a keyboard fueled on red bulls and sour candy. Instead, he’s sitting cross-legged on his bed with Yangyang’s tequila breath on his neck as he bypasses the oval office’s security system with frightening ease.

“It’s happening!” Yangyang shouts like he’s on an episode of The Office.

Renjun sobers up as he stares at the oval office presented on his laptop screen. The room was dark, revealing the shadow of a desk piled high with paperwork, the outline of the presidential seal on marble floors, and two empty couches facing each other, but no president in sight.

“He’s not in his office.” Renjun informs Yangyang, hands flying over the keyboard to access the rest of the camera system.

The screen flickers to reveal the Vice President and the Chief of Staff walking down a hallway, seemingly headed home, the lack of space between them and the Vice President’s hand lingering on the other man’s back reminding him of his roommate and his boyfriend. Renjun raises a brow before the screen changes to several different locations. At the front of the building, the nation’s Treasurer appears to be bickering with a blond journalist, the Secretary of Defense is sitting at his desk in his office, talking on his cell phone with a fond smile, a tall secret service member is playing soccer with a governor in another hallway, and in the garden, a dark-haired boy appears to be saying goodbye to a bed of roses. Clearly, the president had chosen the perfect cabinet. But still, Mark Lee was nowhere to be found.

“Maybe he’s smart enough not to have an affair there-“ Yangyang speaks up only to immediately trail off in shock at the next screen.

Renjun was expecting to see the President with the first lady, proving that the rumors were just that – rumors. Instead, he swallows dryly, eyes wide at what he sees on his laptop. In a corner of the kitchen, two figures could be seen. Though his back was to the camera, it was hard not to miss the navy pinstripe suit President Mark Lee seemed to favor or the dark tie that was currently being tugged at. Renjun never took the boyish, easily flustered Mark Lee to be cheating on his wife, nor was he expecting the president to be licking chocolate icing off pink lips with another man’s legs wrapped around his waist. He’s standing in between the legs of a man that Renjun has seen only in photos from presidential dinners. Lee Donghyuck, the presidential families’ personal chef, is giggling as the president tugs at his wild curls while placing kisses along his jaw.

“Is that chocolate icing?” Yangyang asks once he manages to overcome his shock, “The president has a food kink _and_ a cute boy kink. Talk about a double life.”

Renjun has to agree that the last strip of icing the president licks from the chef’s jaw is questionable and that Lee Donghyuck is probably worth ruining a perfect political career. Once, Renjun had been tempted to sign up for a tour of the oval just to see if they let people into the kitchen. He wanted to tase the meals the president was always bragging about. At least now he knows its not the only thing the president has been eating from his personal chef. Renjun cringes as he wonders why his mind had to take it there.

“Is that food porn?” A voice asks suddenly, making him tear his eyes away from the screen to find Hendery standing there, squinting at the screen.

Xiaojun has also appeared while Renjun was stuck in his daze. The brunet is sitting on the bed beside Yangyang, covering the younger’s eyes as if he hasn’t already watched the president practically eat his personal chef like a cupcake.

“No” Renjun blurts out as he watches the president press his lips against his persona chef’s, running fingers through Donghyuck’s curls and gripping the back of the brunet’s neck as if he’s been deprived. The sight makes Renjun swallow thickly in realization, “It’s the president.”

“And he’s having an affair.” Hendery adds, brow raised in surprise at the sight.

“With his personal chef” Yangyang concludes, slapping Xiaojun’s hand away from his face.

It’s silent in the room as they watch their nation’s leader have his secret affair. Yangyang is explaining to Xiaojun that the icing is for the president’s food fetish when the screen flickers before it goes black. They had been kicked out of the system, which meant that they had been detected beyond its firewall.

“ _Fuck_ ” Renjun curses, running a hand through his hair as all eyes turn to him.

It went without saying that hacking government property was a serious offense. Renjun is a little drunk off tequila and more shocked than usual, but even in his fog of emotions, it doesn’t take much to realizes that he’s absolutely screwed.

Renjun isn’t a paranoid person.

He walked home late from internet cafes in middle school (despite his mother’s warnings) and he sometimes hacked the financial data of large corporations to pass the time between classes. But the Sunday after his birthday, he doesn’t even leave his room for food (instead Hendery brings him two slices of frozen pizza and tries to ask about food kinks, only to have the door slammed in his face by his paranoid roommate). Monday, he has no choice because he has a statistics exam. He breezes through the exam, deciding that he doesn’t care about his very low A in the class when he practically shoves the test at his professor before fleeing. He rushes across the pedestrian walkway like he’s trying to catch the last shuttle home and technically he is.

He had been too paranoid to drive his car or accept the ride Hendery had offered (“Would you relax? We watched the president suck icing off his boyfriend so what.” He had said before Renjun promptly tossed a mechanical pencil at his grinning face). He makes it past the university library, a sign that he’s getting closer to the shuttles when he notices something is off. Among the sea of tired college students are a few hard to miss men dressed in black suits and shades, with earpieces dangling from their ears. Renjun decides to ignore them, trying to remember the shuttle route without pulling the map up on his phone only to quickly give in and fish the device out. He’s frowning at Yangyang’s ten text message presentation on food kinks in the group chat when he looks up to find that the men in black have gotten closer.

“Excuse me” He says to one of them who’s practically brushing against his shoulder, “I am not interested in whatever illegal activities you’re offering.”

But the man in black simply ignores him, though he doesn’t stop following. Renjun picks up his pace only to find that, to his horror, they sped up with him. He turns back to the man with a small glare.

“Look pal-“ He barely gets out two words when the man grabs his backpack and digs through it. Renjun’s eyes widen and he quickly reaches for it, “Excuse me, do you know how far I had to run when I stole that? And you’re just going to snatch it out of my hands like that, asshole-“

He attempts to snatch his backpack back from the man only for two more of the men in black to grab his arms, restraining them behind his back.

“Hello!” He shouts at people as they pass, “I’m being assaulted and _robbed_!”

But then he remembers that this is college, and no one cares unless a student discount is involved. So, people simply ignore his panicked shouts as they dragged their tired and hungover bodies to class and Renjun has never felt more betrayed. He’s forced to watch as the man pulls out his student ID from his bag, glancing at it before nodding. The simple action has the men in black leading Renjun in the opposite direction of the shuttles.

“Excuse me, I have to go home and take my cat for a walk.” He blurts out the first thing that comes to mind as he struggles against his kidnappers, “She’ll pee on my stats notes if I don’t let her out on schedule.”

The men don’t even have the decency to look amused by his poor excuse. They simply restrain him once more, and Renjun quickly feels the fight leave his body. He looks ahead to find people pointing and taking pictures of a limousine parked in the student parking lot. He doesn’t find anything out of the ordinary about the sleek, black limo (except it being parked among the society of the broke and exhausted) until he notices the two flags standing tall at the front end – the nation’s flag. It was the presidential limo. Renjun almost faints. Instead, he’s dragged towards the window where one of the secret service men pull the door open and promptly shoves him inside. The door is slammed shut behind him and the car lurches off seconds later. Renjun blinks at black leather seats before sitting up, heart racing in his chest. He comes face to face with a man in a black suit, black hair styled neatly, sharp eyes staring at him carefully.

“Huang Renjun, yes?” The man asks, and Renjun nods slowly, still in shock.

“Y-You’re-“

“Kim Doyoung” The man holds out his hand with a small smile, “Chief of Staff”

Renjun blinks, simply staring, and the dark-haired man frowns in confusion as he holds his hand out. The college student quickly accepts the handshake then, ears bright red.

“I-It’s nice to meet you, s-sir.” He stutters out as the realization hits.

He hacked a government building and caught the president having an affair. They had caught him and now he was going to jail. He would never see Hendery or his nonexistent cat again. 

“I could say the same for you. It’s really an honor. Top of the science and mathematics department of your university with a 4.0, all while working at a protein shop part-time and providing volunteer cybersecurity classes with your professor on weekends.” Doyoung says with ease, making Renjun swallow thickly and regret not taking the time out to listen to Hendery’s food kink woes. Now, he would never see his roommate again, just a small, cramped cell. The thought nearly makes him whimper, but instead, he struggles to keep his face straight in the face of the president’s Chief of Staff.

“I’m sorry-“ He blurts out, because he thinks it’s better to confess than to have it forced out of him by torture.

“There’s no need to apologize for being an overachiever. It’s much more than I could say for myself during my college days. My GPA wasn’t even close to yours and I’m working for the president.” Doyoung snorts, and that’s how Huang Renjun learns that GPA really is just a bunch of numbers on a piece of paper. He realizes then that it's okay if he actually failed his stats exam. Apparently Doyoung had failed quite a few exams in college and he was still helping run a country. The brunet relaxes, but only slightly when the older man speaks up once more, “You’re just the kind of person the oval needs at the moment. You see, not only do I serve as the Chief of Staff but I also serve as one of the president’s crisis managers which means that when things go to shit, I swoop in and make it rosy. As you are probably aware, there are rumors circling around about an affair in the oval involving the president and another party.”

Renjun watches as Doyoung’s eye flinches, almost too quick to catch, at the mention of the other party. His mind wanders to the bright gleam to Donghyuck’s dark eyes as the president had kissed along his jaw. He wonders what the man beside him would say if Renjun mentioned that he knew of the other party, but he knows better than to send his own self to jail.

“What I am about to tell you now, you cannot breathe a word about outside of this limousine. Do you understand Mr. Huang?” Doyoung says suddenly, making Renjun’s heart skip a beat before he nods. The dark-haired man narrows his eyes before leaning in closer, “Good, because you should know that if you do, we’ll wipe your existence off the face of this earth.”

“I-I understand.” Renjun stammers, shivering as he takes in intimidating dark eyes.

“Where was I then? Oh yes, rumors are going around about the president and his affair, and while the president is a man of great thought, things have gotten careless as of lately… and this political correctness is getting tiresome.” Doyoung cuts himself off with a sigh before smiling bitterly, “The president is being a horny little shit, screwing around in the official government building and his office. Our security system alerted us that the cameras were hacked Saturday night which means that, besides the insider that’s been talking to the press, someone else is aware of what’s been going on behind closed doors-“

Renjun freezes, feeling his blood run cold as he waits for the moment that Doyoung reveals he’s been caught as the hacker. He wonders if he’ll get a chance to call his mother before they dragged him off to prison.

“-and they have pictures that they attempted to blackmail us into purchasing. Luckily for us, we managed to track down the perp, some weirdo living in his mom’s basement, the usual, hasn’t seen the light of day in fifteen years, eats cereal for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Anyway, we’ve got the guy, but he refuses to hand over the pictures and we’ve been unsuccessful in cracking the codes to his computer.” The older man says, making Renjun breathe a sigh of relief until he adds, “This is where you come in.”

“M-Me?” Renjun blurts out.

“Yes, you. You are going to help us get those pictures and save this nation from a scandal that could tear Mark Lee’s presidential term apart.” Doyoung tells him, “As of today, we’ve had you terminated from your job at the protein shop. Whenever you are not in class, you need to report to me, and yes, this includes weekends. Politics do not stop for weekends. From here on out, the secret service will be watching your every move. We will be aware of the time you spend with your roommate, Hendery, Fridays at the internet café, and the Tuesdays and Thursdays you do not have class. Some of that time will have to be sacrificed for your new job as the newest hacker on the president’s crisis management team.”

The limo pulls to a stop and the doors open. Doyoung steps out before motioning for Renjun to follow. The moment the brunet’s foot touches the ground, his eyes widen in shock at the building he’s only seen on election nights.

“Welcome to the world of politics and scandals.” Doyoung tells him, slipping on a pair of black shades with a smirk, “Let’s get a move on. Unless your last name is Lee, the president hates to be kept waiting.”

Renjun scrambles after the older man, secret service swarming them, though they do nothing to block the view of the building who’s cameras he had hacked the night before, a place that housed the president, who’s privacy he had invaded the night before that he now had to save.

“Mr. President! Mr. President! President Lee, over here please!”

Mark smiles at the bright flash of cameras and the shouting of reporters. He points at one with neatly styled blond hair wearing a Versace suit as if he’s at Seoul fashion week, completely missing the distressed look Treasurer Qian Kun sends him in the process.

“Ten Chittaphon with the Neo Daily.” The man stands with a smirk, pen hovering over his clipboard and Mark already regrets his decision, “Sir, what can you say about the rumors swirling around the internet that-“

“This is a press conference about the upcoming UN meeting, not ridiculous, promiscuous rumors of an untrue affair.” Kun cuts the man off, eyes narrowed at the reporter.

“Well, I’m glad you brought up the topic, Treasurer Qian.” The reporter, Ten’s smirk deepens before he regards Mark once more, “Mr. President, is it true that you’re been having an affair in this very building?”

Mark can only blink as the other reporters go _wild_ , screaming and shouting questions even more frantically. The flicker of cameras nearly blinds him, rapid successions of white flash making him squint.

“That is blasphemy and defamation!” Kun shouts, pointing adamantly at Ten, “This man is trying to slander the President with lies and false accusations that have nothing to do with the UN or world peace. Please have him removed from this room, immediately.”

The security guards scramble to remove Ten who pulls off his Gucci slides and attempts to make a dash for the door, only to be tackled by secret service. Mark watches the blond be forcibly removed as he shouts about reporter rights before he clears throat.

“To echo Treasurer Qian’s words, this conference is about the upcoming UN world peace ball we are hosting here in this very building which will feature diplomats and leaders from all over with the hopes of solidifying peace between each nation. Please look forward to it.” Mark says, memorization of one of the flashcards Doyoung had shoved in his hands the day before, “I am glad to have had this chance to speak with you all and I look forward to further promoting unity with global leaders on the 1st of April. Thank you for coming, and here is to a more peaceful future.”

He smiles, not too relaxed but just tense enough to show that he’s still carrying the weight of millions of lives. The flash of the cameras worsens once more and he quickly waves, giving once last smile before he’s escorted from the stage. The moment the cameras and reporters are gone, he shakes off his jacket and loosens his tie.

“Nice work out there. You’re getting better at staying on topic.” His Vice President tells him with a small smile. Lee Taeyong’s hair is slicked back, and his tie has ducks on them that make Mark blink at him in return. 

“Thanks, hyung.” He says finally, rubbing at the back of his neck with a sheepish smile, “But I’m not going to lie. I got kind of freaked out back there.”

“I can imagine. Doyoung is doing his best to clean things up but people are still watching. The things we do now will determine how this entire scandal plays out.” Taeyong tells him, but before Mark can reply, their eyes widen at the sight of the First Lady, who storms towards them with her eyes narrowed. The president barely has time to react before she draws her hand back and smacks him across the face, making the Vice president trail off with a shocked, “-things like _that_ ”

“Eunhye” Mark blurts out, rubbing his cheek in surprise, “Are you insane-“

“You must think I am since you think I’ll believe that cheating rumors just appear out of nowhere, Mr. _President_.” Eunhye sneers before snatching his tie and pulling him closer with a hysterical cry, “You’ve been sleeping around, and I want to know who with. Right now-“

“Can you keep it down?” Mark asks, motioning to the conference they’ve just left, “Reporters are just around that corner-“

The Vice president flinches at the President’s obliviousness, squeezing his eyes shut at the loud slap that follows. Eunhye laughs humorlessly, shoulders trembling from her anger.

“Since you care so much about the reporters, let’s see what they think of your extracurricular activities, Mr. _President_.” She threatens before heading in the direction of the stage.

Mark motions for the secret service, who quickly block her path. 

“Why don’t you take a walk through the garden instead? That might help you clear your mind, so you’ll realize that I have no reason to cheat on you.” He says, reaching over to tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear, “I love you.”

Eunhye stares at him with a fierce intensity before finally, her dark eyes soften.

“Whoever it is, you better end it, Minhyung.” She tells him quietly, “Or I am going to end you.”

Mark watches as she pushes past the secret service, storming out of the room and catching the eye of everyone backstage in the process. He sighs, shoving his hands in his pockets before motioning for one of the secret service members to follow her.

“Should we be worried?” Taeyong asks, staring after the First Lady with a nervous look.

“No because she doesn’t have proof. She’ll calm down eventually and when the rumors die down, she’ll get over it.” Mark tells him, though he can’t help but glance at his watch anxiously as he asks, “Where’s Doyoung hyung? I thought he would be back by now.”

“I’m right here, sir.” A familiar voice says, and when Mark looks over, he lets out a sigh of relief. Doyoung is standing there with an arm slung over a brunet boy wearing specs, “Sorry we’re late, he had to walk his cat. Mr. President, meet Huang Renjun.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Renjun.” Mark greets, holding out his hand to the other boy, “I’m-“

“The President-“ Renjun blurts out before rushing towards him with an excited look, “Can we take a selfie sir? My mother is a big fan. She voted for you, you know, waited two hours in the rain-“

“Are you sure he’s one of the top hackers in the country?” Mark whispers to Doyoung while Renjun takes several selfies, flashing the peace sign at his phone and grinning as if they’re friends. Doyoung simply shrugs in response.

“Mr. Huang, we are really grateful for your mother’s support. But as you can imagine, the president is in some deep shit right about now.” Taeyong speaks up with a strained smile, “We could really use your help.”

“Huh? Oh yeah” Renjun mutters, checking the selfies quickly before saluting with a wide smile, “Huang Renjun at your service Mr. President!”

“Save the saluting for the military. Let’s go kid.” Doyoung tells the brunet with an amused look before leading the way out of the room.

Mark and Taeyong follow them into the hallway where they’re greeted by marble floors and high chandeliers. Renjun stares at the pictures of former presidents in awe as they make their way down the hall. They pass Johnny Seo in a tan suit, holding his cell phone to his ear with an irritated look.

“Watch your tone, diplomat.” The Chief of Defense grumbles to the person on the other line, “You don’t want me to send out the troops, buckaroo.”

“Looks like we’re going to need more than a peace ball by the time that guy is finished threatening global leaders over the phone.” Doyoung sighs once they’ve passed. Renjun glances back at the Chief of Defense and resists the urge to laugh while Mark makes his amusement known by shaking his head despite his grin.

The Chief of Staff leads them around a bend to another, much smaller hall. Sitting at the end of it is a door locked by a code. The Chief of Staff looks around to make sure they’re alone, minus the secret service, before he puts in the passcode, pushing the door and ushering them inside quickly. Inside, the room is dark, the only source of light stemming from the various screens stacked on top of a desk. At the desk is a lone computer and a computer chair that Doyoung quickly ushers Renjun into. Once the brunet is seated, he breathes out in awe. He couldn’t believe it. He hadn’t even finished his degree and he already had the job of his dreams.

“Hack that computer and get those pictures. You have until the end of the day.” Doyoung tells him, and Renjun doesn’t waste any time in nodding before turning the computer on and getting to work.

“In the case that our perp decided to send them to friends, and they’re leaked, what’s our next move?” Taeyong asks, making Mark’s chest tighten with anxiety.

“We deny it, of course.” Is Doyoung’s immediate response as he turns to look at the Vice President, “It was a back shot and as far as everyone else knows, it wasn’t our President. It was just a man with a very similar suit.”

Taeyong nods, though the skeptical look on both his and Doyoung’s faces said that they knew that their plan was fickle, at best.

“And what about Hyuck?” Mark asks, the uneasy expression on their faces making him add, “Will he be okay as well?”

“As the president, you are our priority. Anything and anyone else is second and unimportant.” Taeyong tells him, “Once you’re in the clear, we’ll have to move on-“

“Are you saying that we should leave him out to dry?” Mark interrupts with a scoff, “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“Don’t take this the wrong way Mark, but if this actually gets out, Donghyuck is going to have to be fired-“ Doyoung starts only to be quickly cut off by the president.

“We’re not firing, Donghyuck.” Mark’s words are calm but sharp, and the firmness in his voice is hard to miss, “I don’t even want to hear that being said-“

“Well, it’s going to be in the press if those pictures get leaked, because you will be forced to fire him, if not by me then by Eunhye, your wife, who cares about your approval ratings more than anyone else.” The Chief of Staff tells him, “And having a chef that you personally appointed sleeping around on the job with some unidentified government official who looks a lot like you is really going to start turning the gears in that overly emotional head of hers. She’s already convinced of the affair and it won’t take her long to put two and two together. As soon as she finds out, she’ll have Donghyuck wiped from this building and then your life. So, if you want to keep your _friend_ around, I would suggest only seeing each other as _friends_.”

Silence fills the room and among the soft tapping of Renjun’s fingers on the keyboard, Mark can hear his heart echoing loudly in his chest. Guilt chokes him up, stealing his words, and making him ache terribly.

“I…” He starts, unsure of where to even begin.

“I did it.” Renjun speaks up suddenly.

“You did what?” Doyoung asks with a frown, coming to stand beside the hacker.

“I retrieved the pictures and deleted them.” The brunet tells him simply, “I also traced them before doing so. There are no duplicates besides the ones you all have, so our perp hasn’t sent them to anyone else or made copies. Looks like we’re in the clear.”

“Wow” Taeyong breathes out, a small, relieved smile breaking out onto his face. “He’s good.”

“I only pick the best.” The Chief of Staff says with a smirk before patting Renjun on the shoulder, “Nice work, kid. Looks like you’ve finished your first job and you’re officially crisis agent twenty-three. It’s getting late and I know you like to cuddle with your roommate and watch dramas around this time, so you’re free to go. A car out front will take you home, and once you finish your eight A.M. lecture tomorrow, please report here immediately.”

Renjun shivers at the older man being so familiar with his schedule. He stands from his chair, nodding at his orders before turning to leave only to be stopped by the president himself.

“Thank you.” Mark tells him quietly and even in the darkness of the room, it’s hard not to miss the sincerity in his gaze. Clearly, the President was under a lot of stress and whoever this Donghyuck person was, he was dear to the man’s heart. Renjun was glad that he could help – he figures the President needed it.

“Anytime” He says, and he means it. Mark smiles and Renjun is reminded of how he’s the youngest President their country has ever had, and it shows in how his heart still ruled over his mind. But he figures that’s what made the other man so likable – he cared, and it showed.

Renjun thanks them for the opportunity before leaving to let the three men discuss more important matters. He steps out into the hall, walking back around the bend into the hallway with several doors and paths only to realize he doesn’t know the way out. He’s just about to turn back around and ask for directions when he spots someone headed his way.

“Need some help?” A dark-haired boy asks with a friendly smile that crinkles his eyes in a way that Renjun shouldn’t find cute considering the fact that the other boy was covered in dirt. He takes in the boy’s apron and the trowel in his hands before nodding.

“I’m trying to find my way out.” He says, following after the dark-haired boy when he beckons with the wave of his hand.

“I can help you with that.” The other boy tells him politely, “I’m Jeno, one of the gardeners, and I would offer you my hand, but I’m afraid it’s covered in dirt.”

“I’m Renjun…” Renjun introduces, trailing off. He wasn’t sure how to mention his title. Should he call himself a hacker? Or was he supposed to go by agent twenty-three? Or maybe he was meant to be a secret like the room tucked away behind the bend?

“One of Doyoung hyung’s agents, right?” Jeno guesses, grinning when Renjun’s eyes widen, “You were leaving one of his offices, and he asked me about you. We go to the same university.”

“Oh” Renjun mutters before suddenly feeling brave enough to ask, “What are you studying?”

“Landscape design” Jeno tells him with a bright, hopeful smile, “I want to be a landscape architect. What about you?”

“Computer Science and Information Systems Security” Renjun informs him, hesitating before adding, “I want to be-“

“A hacker” Jeno interrupts, quickly putting two and two together. He glances at Renjun with a small smile, “You’re a hacker for Doyoung hyung.”

“Y-Yes” Is Renjun’s hesitant response that makes the gardener laugh.

“It’s okay. I may be a gardener but I’m pretty in on the loop.” Jeno assures before frowning, “I just hope they can get everything under control for Donghyuck’s sake.”

“Donghyuck is…” The hacker trails off unsurely.

“The one thing that makes our President happy.” The gardener tells him, “Also known as the person he tried to devour on camera.”

“Oh, _that_ Donghyuck” Renjun blurts out, Jeno laughing at the red flush to his face.

“Yes, that Donghyuck.” The gardener says with a smile, “Since you’re working for the President now, you’ll meet the star to his moon in no time. And, trust me, like everyone else, you’ll _love_ him.”

The sincerity in Jeno’s eyes shines beneath the bright chandelier lights and Renjun is left to wonder how much of an impact a simple chef has made on not only the man running their country but others as well. He’s so caught up in the crinkle of the gardener’s eyes when he smiles and the way it makes his cheeks heat up that he doesn’t notice they’ve stopped in front of one of the entrances.

“I hope so.” He tells the dark-haired boy finally, “Thank you for helping me find my way, Jeno.”

“It was nice meeting you Renjun.” The gardener tells him, “I’ll see you around.”

Renjun nods, watching the other boy turn and disappear down another hall before he makes his way to the door. A secret service agent opens it from the outside and he steps into the evening air, making his way to the car waiting out front. Once he’s safely in the backseat, Renjun sighs. He couldn’t believe it. He wasn’t going to jail, he’d met the President, and he now had a job as one of his crisis agents and as a hacker, no less. The brunet rests his head against the leather seats of the limousine and smiles. Maybe getting wasted on his twenty-first birthday wasn’t such a bad idea after all.

Mark stares at the document on his desk blankly. His eyes hurt from straining over words all day and he’s bored of the political jargon. He wants to be anywhere but in his office. But most importantly, he wants to be with a certain someone. The urge is so strong that he’s standing, abandoning his work to leave the office, flicking out the lights without another glance back. He misses the way the secret service agent to his left shakes his head.

“Another kitchen visit, Mr. President?” Yukhei teases, slinging his arm around the dark-haired man because it was only the two of them.

“Playing soccer with Governor Na while on the job again, Mr. Wong?” Mark teases in return, watching as the brunet’s ears turn red from embarrassment.

“He’s a bad soccer player.” The secret service agent says.

“But he’s an amazing Governor.” Mark tells him with a pout, “His approval rating is almost higher than mine.”

“Please do better.” Yukhei urges with a shiver, “The last thing we need is the energizer bunny on crack in the oval office.”

“Maybe he’ll be able to get Chief Seo to stop threatening global leaders using his personal phone.” Mark says just as they pass the Chief of Defense who’s once again on his cell phone.

“Just so you know, I have tanks and not just any tanks, we have, like, the really big kind.” Johnny threatens the other person on the line, suitcase tucked beneath his arm as he leaves for the day, “And we can have them on your front lawn by tomorrow morning so don’t test me, guy.”

“I’m not a politician, but I don’t think it’s politically correct to call a global leader ‘guy.’” Yukhei says with an amused look.

“Not unless you’re the Chief of Defense with an iPhone 11, then you can call them whatever.” Mark tells him making the brunet laugh.

They reach the dining hall before he knows it, and his heart has already begun to sing. His hands itch to run through wild curls and touch smooth skin. He smiles politely and greets the staff who returns the gesture with flushed faces and giddy smiles. They’re used to seeing him sneak away from his office when it gets close to dinner, and they’re also used to his speedy escape to the kitchen. Yukhei remains outside for once while Mark pushes the door open to the kitchen. He peeks inside, relieved to find that, despite the bright lights and food cooking on the stoves, it was empty except for one person. He approaches them slowly, wrapping his arms around a familiar waist and placing a gentle kiss on a soft cheek. 

“You’re going to piss the First Lady off even more.” Donghyuck tells him, concentrating on the cake he was currently icing.

“You came across Eunhye?” Mark frowns, pulling away suddenly.

“More like she came to the kitchen and accused every last female staff member of being a whore, among other things, and screamed at them to stop sleeping with her husband.” The chef explains, turning around with a sigh, “It was nice to experience secondhand embarrassment, I guess.”

“I’ll have to talk to her.” Mark says, though they both knew it would produce meaningless results.

“And don’t forget to apologize to my staff while you’re at it, Mr. President.” Donghyuck reminds before motioning to the cake in front of him with a small smile, “I’m testing out cakes for the peace ball.”

Mark watches as Donghyuck sticks his finger into one of the empty frosting containers, scraping what’s left of the treat up before bringing it to his mouth, savoring the taste with a satisfied hum. The chef takes another swipe of the vanilla frosting, except this time, Mark grabs the brunet’s finger and slips it into his mouth, humming around the sweet taste of vanilla and the warmth of Donghyuck’s skin.

“What the _hell_ , Mark Lee.” Donghyuck snatches his finger away, “Do you not have any shame?”

“Not when it comes to you.” The President tells him with a shrug.

“This is why you had to hire another hacker.” The chef replies as he moves to the sink to wash his hands.

“I’ll hire a million hackers if it means I get to spend more time with you.” Mark says, staring at the brunet with an affectionate look that makes Donghyuck cringe along with his words. 

“I’m gagging-“

“But are you good at it-“

“Get out of my kitchen!” The chef exclaims, using the portable hose to spray the president who quickly flees in an effort to save his suit.

Mark’s loud laughter leaves Donghyuck to place a hand on his chest, shaking his head at the feeling of his racing heart left behind in the President’s departure.

Liu Yangyang has created **Food Kinkology™ 101**.

Liu Yangyang has added Not Xiaojun’s boyfriend™, Xiaojun, and Huang Renjun to **Food Kinkology™ 101**.

Not Xiaojun’s boyfriend™ has changed Huang Renjun’s name to Dusty Abandoner™.

**Xiaojun**

_it’s 2 A.M. stfu_

**Yangyang**

_no one has said anything yet…_

**Not Xiaojun’s boyfriend™**

_…_

**Xiaojun**

_._

**Yangyang**

_so anyway, about the president’s food_

_kink… i have a theory. what if he’s a_

_cannibalist?_

**Not Xiaojun’s boyfriend™**

_he licked some icing._

_it’s not like he smothered pretty_

_boy’s face with it and ate that too._

**Xiaojun**

_you would know…_

_wouldn’t you mr. pretty boy enthusiast_

**Not Xiaojun’s boyfriend™**

_?????_

_you’re pretty too_

**Xiaojun**

_whatever_

**Yangyang**

_sounds like you’re sleeping_

_on the floor tn, congrats on_

_the achievement @Hendery the 0 th _

**Not Xiaojun’s boyfriend™**

_not unless you open the door_

_when i come to ur place :^)_

**Yangyang**

_no_

_anyway, i’m just saying that when_

_you’re sucking on limbs like that,_

_you’re practically consuming them so_

_it might not be a food kink but actual_

_cannibalism_

**Not Xiaojun’s boyfriend™**

_but he’s not actually eating the guy_

**Yangyang**

_well he’s clearly slurping down_

_pretty boy’s fingers like he’s dealing_

_with a 7/11 slushie, hendery_

**Not Xiaojun’s boyfriend™**

_i mean…_

_a few points were made_

**Dusty Abandoner™**

_it’s 2 a.m. everyone STFU_

**Yangyang**

_goodnight_

**Not Xiaojun’s boyfriend™**

_yes, goodnight_

**Xiaojun**

_…_

_????? i just??????_


End file.
